Will Clark World

THE DIRTY LITTLE SECRET

It's Tuesday and another day closer to our Big Bingo Night with hottie Bryan Slater to benefit Out of Bounds/Team New York.

And even more exciting there seems to be some excitement growing 'out there' as we approach the 100K mark! And of course why shouldn't it be a cause for celebration?? A lot of people have worked hard over the years to get to this point so I couldn't be happier!

But that's tomorrow. But today, there's something I've been meaning to write about and that's the Equality March this weekend in DC.

I'm sure it will be a huge success and people will pour in from all over to walk down the street and to hear all sorts of speakers talk about equality. There's also the news that Obama will speak at a big fundraising dinner the night before. Naturally the common hope is that he announces the repeal of DOMA or DADT but I dunno, after his clear stated opposition to gay marriage during the campaign, how can we expect anything other than .. well, opposition? Some in the community are surprised by this, but I'm not. And I voted for him anyway because there are bigger things to take care of at the moment, like health care, the economy, those little wars over yonder. And the only other choice we were presented with (McCain/Palin) was, to me, odious and frightening.

Now, I was kinda excited by the March when I first heard aboutit during the summer ... but I have to admit that over the past few weeks, especially as I've heard the organizers cook up a song competition straight out of American Idol to decide what the theme song for the weekend should be. That's a cute gimmick and gets people texting like mad (is the community in bed with Verizon now?) but I don't know how much weight it really carries when you're talking about a National Equality March. I mean, do I like song A or song B? Who gives a fuck? If we're not taking a political march seriously, why should anyone else?

And that's partially what's at the crux here for me. I'm all for fun, I produce and host a weekly fundraising event that, in an underlying way, tackles some supremely difficult subjects: AIDS, homelessless, teenage runaways, discrimination, etc.... but I opposed the 2000 March because it became a circus of 40 platforms (most of which had little to nothing to do with GLBT rights) and a bevy of circuit party dances that overshadowed the importance of the weekend.

And yet, if we can't dance, is this a revolution that we want to be a part of?

So I've struggled whether to support it or not.

I think one of the tipping points for me was that for all the talk of inclusion, the sex worker industry isn't represented on the speaker list or in any of the official endorsements. It simply reinforces an uncaring attitude that the public already has (and for all my carping about the industry over the years both publicly and privately, the one thing that I can say about the gay porn industry at least is that these are a bunch of people who will drop everything to do fundraising for important causes. I guess that's not sexy or anything which is why it tends to be under-reported even by our own entertainment writers, but it is, in fact, a fact).

And it isn't that they don't think we care, it's that the organizers are nervous about calling attention to the dirty little secret that gay porn and escorts and go go dancers exist. Don't you know, you have to keep us out of the spotlight because we might hurt the chances of equality... and this has been a chronic problem for the GLBT community - we want to be sexual, we want to express our sexuality but we don't want our sexuality to be broadcast. WTF?

So, over time I realized that the Equality March is just another corporate machine ... like Prides have become -- political action without any real bite, but enough bite for a soundbite or two (if they're lucky).

I predict what will happen: the organizers will say that twice as many people attended, the National Parks Service will report that half as many people attended and lots of people will return home with buttons and stickers and probably a few phone numbers... but I don't expect our rights to be handed to us on a silver platter on Monday morning, just because we schlepped ourselves to DC. And I think that's what is being promised: that this will change everything. I don't think it will.

Let me take it from a different perspective -  when I heard others that oppose the spending on the March I just thought they were killjoys. These people in our community were asking the tough questions -- like, are celebrities paying their own way, staying on a friend's couch and getting nothing for standing at a podium and addressing the March? (dream on, Mary!) Is the audio and stage equipment being donated? (hah!!) How much are the permit fees? How many thousands are being spent anyway?  I thought they were making trouble just to be cranky.

But over time, the more I heard about the March and the more the above things crept into my head, the more discouraged and conflicted I got.

I now think it would have been better for us to have individually donated the money that it will cost us to get there and would have spent there (probably easily a thousand dollars per person) to struggling local GLBT non profits. For every thirty people, that's a staff position for one year at most non profits (outside of New York City.. but here it's not much more frankly).

A party is good. Saving lives is better. Naturally you can argue that by coming out in force in DC, we ARE saving lives, but I think it's a more mystic intangible but only possible outcome than supporting struggling non profits in a difficult economy; non profits that are vanishing day by day. Granted, in a capitalist society such as ours, if a non profit doesn't succeed, I guess it ought to vanish... but try telling that to the people who depend on it's services to stay alive.

In any event, the party train is set, DC will be a blast I'm sure. I wish it well, and will spend my time elsewhere with my boyfriend -- which is pretty much about the best thing I can think of to spread equality: and that is, simply being equal.

CLEANING OUT. THERE, I SAID IT.

It’s time to clear off the virtual desk and first things first…. A few of you stopped me Wednesday night and a couple of you even wrote to me this afternoon after I’d posted pictures of me wearing the “meatrack” t shirt .. you know the one with the drawing of a deer in a woods with a small jewel up it’s ass? Well, if you’re out on Fire Island, you can stop by the shop, Summer Solstice in the Pines and ask for the Deputy Dirtylegs t shirts. I’ve got five of them to give away over the next few weeks at Bingo (thanks Greg!) but I’d say if you’re already out there on the Island for the Pines Party, you might as well get ‘em and have ‘em.

If you’ve got an iPhone, then you’ll want to be the first one on your block to get the Athletic Model Guild’s second app, titled  “Beefcake” which displays the best of beefcake photography from AMG founder Bob Mizer. From the AMG press release (who can say things about their own company much better than I can pretend to.. meow) 

“AMG Beefcake!” is the first vintage gay male photography app to be approved by Apple. Late last month an app, entitled “Hottest Girls”, appeared in the iTunes store, displaying multiple shots of topless women. The tech giant soon pulled the app, stating to CNN that its position on nudity stood firm. AMG press consultant Christopher Trout said that while they won’t try and sneak anything past censors, AMG is prepared for the day when Apple will follow the lead of the federal government.

“We’ve got a couple of fully-nude apps in the works," Trout said, "it’s just a matter of time before Apple loosens its reigns, and when they do, you’ll be seeing a whole lot more of our models on your iPhone.”

I’m also cleaning up the actual desk by looking at little scraps of paper with ideas for blogs that have taken up residency here..

A fragment of an idea about how the gay porn industry is always making ‘the gay porn version’ of everything and how I’d like there to be something in the industry that’s not “the gay porn” version of anything. I’d really like to see ‘the gay porn’ version of ‘gay porn’. I never really fleshed it out but it does still irritate me. Although I will confess to enjoying at least the idea of those THIS AIN’T STAR TREK movies from the straight side.

Speaking of porn, I think Hot House or Raging Stallion should make a bondage and torture movie starring a Perez Hilton look-a-like. I say, give the people what they want. Come on, you people who are complaining about the August Advocate cover know exactly what I’m talking about. If we're going to make him our community's punching bag, why not just really do it and get it all out? (I'm not saying I can stand the man, I can't .. but geez, some of the complaints to the magazine about cancelling their subscription, well, it's really ridiculous and makes most people who are commenting sound like old ladies)

There’s also a rambling diatribe that I scrawled bout Michael Jackson’s children. It’s not so much a blog entry as a scribbly sad realization while on my flight to San Francisco a couple weeks ago that his poor children are never going to be without controversy and will have competing bio moms and bio dads and grandparents and lawyers for the foreseeable future. At least DaniLynn was too young to know what kind of crusades were being fought in her name. These kids are having to live through it. There’s enough trauma associated with being name Prince 1 and Prince 2 (as though being named by Dr. Suess and having to join dubiously named celeb children such as Apple, Crimefighter and God knows what else on the playground of some public school and wonder aloud ‘why did our parents hate us so much as to give us such shitty names?” to which they’ll rebel by becoming blandy Dicks and Janes).

Then there’s a cute little scrap that says ‘getting out of the San Francisco Powerhouse at midnight on a Saturday night; it’s like escaping the Triangle Waist-coat Factory fire”. I attribute that to my friend Matthew (he’s always got the best lines, dammit)

Oh, yes, and then there’s the thing that I overheard at Al’s Comic Shop, also in San Francisco… I loved the shop and wish there was as good a comic shop here in New York City (imagine, how shocked I was that the Castro has two kick ass comic book shops while New York has shops but they’re not very great places). Anyway, the owner, presumably ‘Al’ and I started talking because I loved loved loved how the shop smelled (like old news print) and how expertly he had arranged everything. He commented that I should put something on Yelp (which I did) since he gets lots of complaints. I commented that people just have nothing better to do with their time than complain, to which a random guy in the shop that was eavesdropping said “oh there’s always time for complaining, but you have to work at it.” Truer words were never said.

Speaking of San Francisco and clearing out stuff, yesterday I finally picked up the pictures from the disposable camera I took when I left my camera at home. There’s a couple shots of me and Michael Soldier at the Cockette’s show where Michael plays a baddie named Chang (it’sa kick ass show called PEARLS OVER SHANGHAI and it plays through mid-August, don’t miss it!) and then there’s another pic of a fantastic photographer named Rich Trove who was being honored that night for having taken his 100,000 picture. Awesome dude. They tied him up on stage because dude would have wanted to spend his whole party snapping pictures because that’s just what Rich does. Congrats to Travis, a recent Mr. San Francisco leather for putting on a kick ass event and hello to my friend Mama Sandy and other friends that I ran into there.

OK that clears off a little part of my desk and fills up both my virtual and my real trashcan. Til tomorrow everyone!

QUEER NEWS THAT'S FIT TO PRINT (MOSTLY) OR THINGS YOU LICK

Things are busy over here at Will Clark World.. Pride left me a little exhausted, but the good kind where I sit on the couch numb from activity but also excited by all the cool people I met along the way!

Unfortunately Pride ended with a big ‘plop’ for the staff of HX Magazine here in New York as publisher Matthew Bank sold the business to an anonymous buyer and laid off all of the employees. So far the new owners name nor a new staff or publishing schedule has yet to be announced… and some here in New York wonder if this is like OJ and ‘the real killers’ i.e. something that will never come to pass. It’s curious and of course also sad as HX was a staple of New York nightlife for over 15 years. But, on an even more curious note, the HX website is still current so either it's on auto pilot or it's like the Willy Wonka factory and being run by mysterious oompa loompas.... curiouser and curiouser... and since we're on the subject of 'curious'... I'm sort of half curious to see Bruno.. my hesitation isn't that it may or may not be making fun of The Gays (which is almost certainly is, seriously, wake up people) but it just might not be that great of a movie. I don't find it interesting or funny anytime anyone needs to put the spotlight on stupendously stupid people to prove that people are ...stupendously stupid. Religulous proved that (and Bruno is from the same director)

Thankfully though, NEXT continues undaunted and unflappable providing the best listings and features anyway so we’re in good hands. You can find out more about NEXT by going to www.nextmagazine.net

In other nightlife news, Michael Fesco over at the Sea Tea announced yesterday that this Sunday’s Sea Tea (July 12th) which was supposed to be a night to benefit and celebrate Heritage of Pride (see also: the organization that backed out of the June 24th Bingo 90 minutes before show time) has cancelled their attendance. Michael didn’t give a reason for their backing out at the last minute (what, did Sea Tea promise an appearance by Dustin Lance Black?) but it’s particularly shocking since this is the first time in the thirteen years that the Sea Tea has been in operation that it's had to cancel a night.

Thankfully on Sunday July 19th the Sea Tea is back with DJ Max Rodriguez along with a very special entertainer, Jose Luis, who performs as Michael Jackson in Vegas at the “Legends” show. The Sea Tea booked him months ago and it’s just an odd coincidence that he’s appearing now…  

And then on Sunday July 26th, it’s the sixth (and raunchiest) Bad Boys on the Hudson with a half dozen of your Bad Boys favorites that you’ve cum to love and adore over the years – Torez, Mr. New York Leather 2009 Jase Woodruff, Mike Dreyden (Go Go Idol), Jonny Mack (Woof!), Tyger Hudson and Duke Rivers (Tom of Finland parties). DJ Philip Kimball (HOP’s Pier Dance 2009) will send you into orgasmic spasms throughout the three hour dance party and our resident Bingo bitch Amanda Takehometomother will slap a sharp ruler over your knuckles if you misbehave (unless she's already there ahead of you) all which will benefit the hot hot hot men from Team Eagle, who are raising funds for Braking the Cycle, the 300 mile bike ride from Boston to New York in September. So you’ll get good show and it’ll go to a worthwhile cause. Who said that there’s no fun in fundraising? You can find tickets on sale now at www.seatea.com

Anyway, tonight is the next installment of our ongoing Porno Bingo extravaganza featuring the aforementioned Jonny Mack (from Woof and IS woofy!) and Robbyne Kaamil, a fantastic comedian  who’ll do her best to shake up the joint (and sometimes our joint does indeed need shaking up!). Funds raised will go to benefit Strength in Numbers, aka SIN, the men’s HIV positive social network of New York City. That’s from 8pm to 10pm at Pieces Bar located at 8 Christopher Street. Join us for booze, boys and Bingo!

I'm off to San Francisco on Thursday and may be able to post a little before I go but I'll definitely be back on Friday with the latest if not the greatest bloggesty blog blog on teh internets. <wink>

WOULD HE OR WOULDN'T HE? HE DIDN'T, HERE'S THE STORY

Well, what a crazy week THAT was… as those of you know who follow this blog, last Wednesday’s Bingo was a challenging night what with our scheduled charity, Heritage of Pride, canceling out just 90 minutes before we were to start an event that they had begged to be booked at months ago….and taking it’s confirmed guests, Dustin Lance Black and Cleve Jones along with it. Apparently I wasn’t supposed to advertise that Black and Jones would be there. What did HOP think I was going to do once they confirmed them? Make people guess who my guests were? Ridiculous. 

A big apology to the young gays who showed up eager to meet their idol (Black), disappointed that Bingo was one of the only events that he was scheduled to be at that they could afford to go to. Making yourself the model for the young and then charging 20somethings (who typically, especially in this economy, don’t have a ton of disposable income) an arm and a leg to come and see you doesn’t make much sense to me.

But here are where people are heroes.

Our XXX star Nick Capra www.nickcapra.com flew in that day from Los Angeles and showed up ready, willing and able to give good show (which he more than did). Our very special guest, singer Bianca Leigh belted out a couple of beautiful numbers that really got us into the perfect mood. And our friends over at Lucas Entertainment showed up with a bag of flicks just in time for the first round to start (thanks Patrick!). Plus my best friend Matt from the west coast who joined us with a bunch of San Fran goodies that we used as prizes.

And despite the fact that they had their own bigger event going on down the street at Stonewall, the Gay/Lesbian Anti Violence Project www.avp.org offered not only to be our last minute beneficiary for the evening but they sent four fantastic and enthusiastic volunteers down to work the room and just be fabulous. And what did they get for their effort? Just over $1000 raised in two and a half hours through Bingo card sales and an auction for our p0rn star’s underwear that went nearly to a near record $475 (we love our friends from Canada as well as our other friends who were bidding too).

But, on an even brighter note, Cleve did show up later on in the show insisting that he knew nothing about being confirmed for the Bingo event and set out to get the crowd whipped up into a frenzy about the October March on Washington for Equal Rights. Which many of us agreed will be great fun and not at all bloated like the disastrously mis-managed March on Washington in 2000 (where circuit party queens didn’t even realize that there was a political rally at the center of the weekend). You can go to www.nationalequalitymarch.com to sign up for the March and get regular updates.

Now, tonight at Bingo, it’s Amanda Takehomeother (“I’m just a girl who can’t say no… to cash!”) and myself calling out the numbers so that you, yes you, you lucky dog, can attempt to win back some of that cash that you lost over the weekend (along with your self respect and a watch or two). It’s our “semi annual, post big fag event, no stars, no charity” Jackpot Bingo night!! Four or five rounds (depending on how fast we get through the first couple) where the cash you pay for your bingo card is the prize! Lots of cheap booze and great fun telling our Pride stories (even possibly some of the X rated ones….) at Pieces Bar located at 8 Christopher Street from 8pm to 10pm tonight, Wednesday July 1st!  See you there!

(pictures from last week will be up by tonight!)

THEY THREW $1000 AWAY AND AVP FOUND IT

OK so Pride week has been the debauch that I thought it would be and then some. I stayed up til the wee hours Tuesday morning and woke up with some minor aches and cotton. Tuesday night, my best friend arrived in town to stay with me and since it was late upon his arrival, we didn't go out. I mean, since he's from California it was early for him but late for me. But nonetheless, Wednesday morning, no hangover.

This morning, too, no hangover because ...well, I woke up after drifting (and boy do I ever mean drifting) into bed at the stately Wayne Manor hour of 5am. Nice. So no hangover because grrrl.. I'm still a little tipsy. That sounds awfully girly I know but apt. So today, my second to the last at my dull day job, will not be fun, mostly because at some point my body will realize I've had less than four hours sleep and is seriously dehydrated and man, that will so not be pretty. I was going to call this The Hangover, real life edition but settled on the title because.. well, you know.

But you wanna know all about last night at Porno Bingo, doncha? I was going to wait but who knows what condition I'll be in later today and later, the department that I almost formerly work for will go bowling after work. Oh joy. We'll be having some fun. Porn star Nick Capra, singer Bianca Leigh and righteous indignation that Heritage of Pride canceled out on us last night (literally 90 minutes before show.. I KNOW!!) and tonight, bowling with the colleagues from the job I've been laid off from. My life is too weird even for me.

Crazy, right? But that's why you come to this blog isn't it?

I thought so.

Anyway, before I schlep down to the bathroom to start the process of pulling my shit together (my contacts are welded to my eyes, this is what happens when you sleep in daily wear) in order to pretend to my workmates that I actually did nothing more last night than watched crappy reality shows, let me shout out to my ridiculously loyal friends over at the Gay and Lesbian Anti Violence Project www.avp.org who not only threw what can easily be called a ragingly successful fundraiser at Stonewall raising lotsa bucks for themselves early in the evening, but also  saw an opportunity to make a little more money and help US out by coming down to Pieces and be our last minute beneficiary.

How much did we raise for them by selling bingo cards, and by auctioning off Nick Capra's jockstrap, Love Ball tickets and Tin Pan Alley Rag tickets?? Oh yeah, over a THOUSAND DOLLARS with one fantastic customer vowing to go to their site today and drop a few more bucks as a donation.

Can you imagine anything more incredibly ridiculous than a charity turning down a thousand dollars in these hard economic times all because the event is called PORNO BINGO??

But thanks to singer Bianca Leigh who ROCKED Pieces last night and also a shout out to Cleve Jones and Gilbert Baker who showed up towards the end of the night with mea culpas from their end (although nothing yet from the Dustin Lance Black camp) ... and to Lucas Ent for providing dvds and the Saint at large for the VIP Love Ball tickets... and of course to my friend Matt who brought all sortsa goodies as well as to Nick Capra, who showed off his. Tasty. 

We went off to DTOX to catch the as always fantastic Trai la Trash show.. she is by far one of the most talented performers in New York and funnier than hell. After that, it was off to Nowhere where we lolligagged for a couple hours before piling into a cab and going home.

OK.. I'm going to be incredibly late for work... but what are they going to do, fire me? Too late!!

WILL HE OR WON'T HE? TONIGHT AT PRRRNO BINGO!

I hope you had a good rest last night because there is no sleep time from here on in til maybe a cat nap Saturday afternoon. Seriously.

Tonight the fun begins at a space next to the Leslie Lohman Gallery (28 Wooster Street at Grand Street in Soho) from 6pm to 9pm with 10%, a silent art auction featuring the work of over 70 LGBTQ (the Q would be for ‘Questioning’ in case you weren’t aware) artists. A $20 ticket will get you drinks and food throughout the evening and will go to benefit gay artists and cancer patients. Sponsored by the Rema Hort Mann Foundation, The Armory Show and Visual AIDS. www.rhmfoundation.org/10percent/index.html

Meanwhile, up at Stonewall I’ll be celebrating at the place that started it all forty years ago with the fine folks over at the Gay/Lesbian Anti Violence Project for their annual fundraising night, Fusion!

DJ Randy Bettis will be spinning and it’ll be filled with a lot of AVP’s supporters, definitely a highlight of the gay pride week!  That’s from 6 to 9pm at the historic Stonewall at 53 Christopher. You can go to www.avp.org/events.htm  to get tickets and info. $50 in advance, $75 at the door if available.

And then, from 8pm to 10pm we have the biggest night EVER at Bingo with a trio  of confirmed guest stars that will knock your socks off all to benefit Heritage of Pride www.nycpride.org

First, we have super sensational singer and West Village staple, Bianca Leigh along with Los Angeles based p0rn star and all around hottie, Nick Capra www.nickcapra.com who’s launched a new website that any lover of good ol’ fashioned man on man action will enjoy!

But wait, as they say, there’s more.

In addition, we have one of them ‘community activists’ that the politicos like to go on and on about, the one and only Cleve Jones, one of Heritage of Pride’s Grand Marshal’s in this years parade.

Plus! VIP tickets to the Love Ball, tickets to Dance 208’s Friday night ‘bear’ party, two tickets to Roundabout’s Tin Pan Alley Rag, films from Lucas Entertainment and a whole lotta fun prizes direct from San Francisco’s visiting dignitary, Mama Gorgeouix.

And then there’sthat other guy (you know who I mean) who may or may not show up. He's agreed, backed out, confirmed and backed out again and .. .. what's the latest..? Who knows? You’ll just have to join us and find out (I don’t even know the answer myself).  I sure do hope he joins us.. we've got a few dozen copies of his Advocate cover to sign courtesy of the folks at Regent Entertainment. Ack!

Naturally that’s atPieces Bar at 8 Christopher Street located just off 6th Avenue in the West Village.

See you there tonight for what promises to be a night of craziness, just the way we like it in New York City!

RAINY GAYS ON MONDAYS

There’s just so much stuff going on today that I don’t even know where to start? With Amazon? With the National Organization for Marriage? Where or where do I even begin?

Let’s start with the tragic news just in from www.AVN.com that legendary adult actress Marilyn Chambers has died at the age of 57. Reads AVN: “Marilyn Chambers, star of such golden age classics as Behind the Green Door and Insatiable, was found dead Sunday in the mobile home where she had been living for the past several months. She was 57. Chambers was found by her daughter, McKenna. No cause of death is yet known, and an autopsy will be performed.”

You can also read a brief article about this on the LA Times website (which told me something I never knew, that she was an Ivory Soap pitchwoman back in the day)
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/04/porn-star-marilyn-chambers-found-dead-in-los-angeles-county-home.html

Speaking of the LA Times, they also recently reported of the dustup between Amazon and the GLBT community when certain titles went missing from the ranking that Amazon does with the books they carry. You can read the initial blog about it in writer Mark Probst’s blog here : http://markprobst.livejournal.com/15293.html, read a follow up “Open Letter to Amazon” here (from Booksquare): http://booksquare.com/open-letter-to-amazon-regarding-recent-policy-changes  And a sort of overall article about it here:

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/jacketcopy/2009/04/amazon-deranks-gayfriendly-books-the-twitterverse-notices.html

Naturally this had people peeved over the holiday weekend and writers of all stripes and orientations came out of the woodwork yesterday and last night to read Amazon the riot act (and deservedly so). For in trying to (once again) ‘protect the kiddies” Amazon has cherry picked titles from the GLBT community to de-rank claiming ‘erotic content’ (now where have I heard THAT before?) while leaving content from places, like oh Playboy’s centerfold model book. Meanwhile, the Amazon blog is promoting the uber violent Terminator 2016 game that comes out to coincide with the new movie in May.

But in fairness, today, when the staff of Amazon returned from the holiday weekend after finding, what I’m sure were thousands of angry letters from perturbed writers (my advice is by the way, never break up badly with a writer because you will be ‘told off’ in scintillating prose), they put out a little announcement (covered in the above links) that claims the loss of rankings was a ‘glitch’. Uh huh. We’ll see.

Thankfully there is some levity this morning… first, a video clip courtesy of my gal Rachel on the National Organization for Marriage’s catchy 21st century name (you know, like 2QT2BST8)

 

Manhunt indeed.

The guys who actually own the 2M4M site have finally launched this past weekend and they want YOU to join them and post and suggest action. http://www.2m4m.org  You can find their blog here: http://www.2m4m.org/index.php?option=com_myblog&Itemid=93 And it’s only mid afternoon on a Monday. This is going to be a LONG week as I hear that the Octomom is nearly ready to ink a deal for a reality show. Oy!

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOMOS

It's Monday, I've been living out of a suitcase since last Wednesday morning and I'm officially over it. I miss my boyfriend and I actually miss the day job. How easily made homesick I am. The trip overall was fun and revelatory culminating in a run-in with the always fabulous Michael Soldier aka Precious Moments. It's true when they say, if you start talking about someone, they'll appear. Someone at the GayVNs Saturday invoked Michael's and Precious's name and out he popped. He reports that he's well, and is preparing to do a 'where are they now?" shoot for some LA based magazine (it was late, I was tired when he told me so I don't know which one but hopefully someone will let me know). MIchael does incredibly well performing around town and is slated to appear next in drag at a school in the Castro for lgbt youths. Inform them early about drag I say.

  And speaking of drag, yeah, my friend Matt and I dragged it up for the show Saturday night. They did say 'dress up' which some folks thought meant 'wear the crappiest thing you own and show up because that's how you roll' but then again maybe we went overboard with matching Versace shirts and Hugo Boss jeans (on me, Matt's were Dior). (and a side note, only two people noticed and one of them thought that Matt's shirt was faded and mine was newer when they both had been bought Friday night).

Anyway, unlike many other visits to awards shows, I didn't take copious notes or tons of pictures. "in the day" the most fans could hope for was a rehash of the shows in mags a few weeks later so a bunch of us would write online late into the night. Now, folks from various mags were texting the results as they happened which is a great use of technology. Sure.

But I did get a shot of "Cruella de Masters" and Spike and our friend Danny (proof of participation in the 'guyliner' theme night) as well as Sister Roma meeting and greeting folks as they stepped out of taxis and limos (I hear tell that one porn guy arrived on foot, saw how others were arriving and then hopped into a taxi and paid the schlub to take he and his friend back around the block to arrive at the Castro Theatre whereupon he got out and 'made an entrance" just feet from where he'd gotten into the taxi to begin with.. no names.. oh fuck, it was ME! LOL )

In other embarassing Will Clark news, I went up to Gina de la Vina Saturday night at the afterparty thinking she was Sharon Kane. On the up side, she was canoodling with Scott Tanner and it was a pleasure to meet him and Gina is a kind and lovely soul. On the down side, I felt like a boob. Oh and I got to see Ricky Sinz and Mike Dreyden shirtless (and probably pantsless if I had stayed for a little while longer.... but we were part of the Donna Sachet entourage and that girl just doesn't stand still!!)

And finally, for the obligatory  Mr. Pam and Michael Lucas mention not only because they were there and looked incredible but also because hey, I can increase my Google Analytics score just as cheesily as anyone else can. (and yes, for those of you late to the game there was a classic Michael Lucas Moment at the Awards which just goes to prove that you can't miss a moment of these shows or you'll miss the only remotely interesting industry related thing that happens in between the acceptance speeches some of which range in complexity from 'thanks" to "thank you" (Dink Flamingo, Dean Phoenix and Chris Steele being among the outstanding exceptions and frankly I could simply listen to Gino Colbert talk about the interesting history of the porn industry all night long. Will someone please get this man money to produce a documentary where he can talk to all the founders of the genre while they're still here? )

There's tons of commentary out there and oh God, clearly yesterday was a slow gay news day for this to be The Big Gay Topic on various sites.... )

I'm hopping Jet Blue and getting my butt back home in time to work a premiere party for a Broadway show tomorrow night and then Bingo on Wednesday night from 8 to 10. This weekend in New York the first annual erotic art fair is on Saturday followed by the first new GREED party at Irving Place Saturday night. Details to follow when I'm at the desk of my day job looking like I'm doing the job that they're paying me to do.         

THE GOLD MAN

I usually watch the whole Oscars thing beginning to bitter end but discovered Kathy Griffin was in town and as one of the many gays that follow her, I felt obliged to go see her instead….. and I wasn't disappointed. I laughed for two and a half hours non stop. Even though the guy next to me was two sizes too big for his chair and elbowed me the entire time, even though I sweated through the shirt I wore and even though I watched most of her act on a giant video screen.. I still thought it was a great choice.

And man, did she dish it out. Railed on Oprah, Ryan Seachrest, The Jonas Brothers, The Grammys, and of course New Years Eve on CNN. There were a few moments where I had no flippin idea who she was talking about (like TI.. I had to look him up when I got home!) thus making me feel a lot older than the 45 years I turn in a couple weeks… but what I couldn’t catch directly, I figured out in context. And yeah, I laughed for two and a half hours non fucking stop.

Still, by the time I made my way home,  I still managed to catch the last hour and a half of the Oscars show which was, pretty much, just about enough for me. I wasn’t really into any of the nominated movies (yes heresy, I know, I thought MILK was really good but borderline Best Pic material) and so just felt unmotivated to care as much this year. It’s rare, but it does happen even to an ardent movie fan such as myself. There were some really great movies that got totally overlooked this year which is really too bad. But then, I continue to live in the fantasy that all awards shows are about merit.

If you followed me on Facebook, you’ll know that I spent some of the time battling with FBers who really feel the need to continue to punish Jerry Lewis for calling us faggots a couple years ago. I guess his decades of service of fundraising don’t mean squat and his status as a film comedian (even if his brand of comedy sort of lost me after I turned, oh, maybe 8) is irrelevant when we get our dander up.

Honest to God people… so he cracks fag jokes. Does that really affect how you see yourself?

And let’s not get too much into the one FBer who likened Jerry Lewis’ homophobia to Ronald Reagan’s inaction to the AIDS crisis. Apparently there is no difference (to some) to the total abandonment of an international health crisis by the leader of the United States of America and a few faggot jokes by the guy who MC’s a Labor Day telethon for 18 hours every year and made some road movies with Dean Martin.

But then I was also amused by how many FBers name drop (or am I just annoyed that there was no Oscar party on the 3 express train uptown?) LOL ;)

Anyway, my highlights of the evening included: Queen Latifah belting out "I'll be seeing you" during the In Memoriam segment (and wasn’t Paul Newman’s bit just fantastic?) as well as the “Heads of State Actresses” panel bestowing their individualized critiques on each Best Actress nominee as though they themselves alone decided which of them is the best. I also dug the previews of upcoming movies over the end credits. Seems like a smart/natural thing to do.

The lowlights? Realizing that "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" is an ABC show.. which made me think that I hope someone over at Viacom releases "Survivor: The Movie" when the Oscars are on CBS. :) At least there was no embarrassing Laugh In tribute. Ugh!

END OF THE WEEK CRABBIES

I have end of the week crabbies. In addition to a dead end day job where a sort of boss of mine seems to be hell bent on making my life miserable at the same time as he looks like he's helping me, I've been struck by a bad headache.. ugh. The only that saves this poor pitiful week from being a complete waste of the time/space contiuum is that Bingo on Wednesday night raised a fucking buttload of cash for CHEER New York's Cheer for Life Fund which helps out other people (you know, instead of making their lives more miserable) to the tune of $1,114.00 smakeroonies. My favorite part of the evening was watching members from the team outreach on the street with flyers made from the poster I created.. now THAT'S a dedicated fundraising machine! 

Anyway, what added to my dis-phoria (a made up word for the opposite of euphoria) was a lazily written article about how gay men are spending more on bars and clubs than they used to (but only because we're in a 'depression') and that how somehow magically gay nightlife is suddenly hot again.

It's a terribly shallow article and neglects to mention/include/account for those of us (like myself, Max Scott, Joe Fiore, Mark Nelson, Daniel Nardicio et al) that have been doing a hell of a job doing fantastic sex friendly events for YEARS at bars that don't charge anything or much to get into at really reasonable drink prices and have been filling up rooms. It annoys the hell out of me when someone stumbles into a bar and then writes a big article like this without doing one shred of their homework... and presumably gets paid for it.  I love it how the author makes it sound as though these events have only just now appeared because he's just discovered them!

Find out why print journalism is dead by reading: http://www.observer.com/2009/o2/gays-love-depression